I found myself irritated today when I woke up. I was in a lot of pain, it didn't matter which way I moved in bed, I hurt. Due to that physical state, I saw no desire to get out of bed. My children were playing quietly in their room, I had my phone and iPad there. I was pretty much convinced I could lie there all day.
But I didn't. After being awake for 20-25 minutes, I convinced myself to get out of bed. Found the willpower and I did it. A few hours later, I was still in a lot of pain and it had me really discouraged. I pretty much stayed on the couch until the husband came home. Wait, I take that back, 30 minutes or so before he walked in the door, I started folding laundry. And that's when it hit me...
A week ago, I couldn't even walk on my own. I still needed to be assisted when I walked. I was finally able to cook dinner tonight for the first time in two weeks. I'm still only 2 weeks post op on my knee as of Thursday. My knee can be bent almost comfortably now, even though I still can't sit Indian style. Another small improvement, I can cross my ankles when I sit on the couch now and I can cross my legs. That is something I haven't been able to do without pain in almost 2 months.
So, when I get discouraged for not being 100% yet, I need to sit back and look at the small accomplishments. I've always been this way though, so it's hard to be any different. I'm my biggest (and worst) critic when it comes to some things. Today I was proud of myself for not completely beating myself up. Saturday was the first day I was walking completely unassisted. That was less than a week ago! I just need to keep exercising the way the doctor showed me; I need to keep getting up and moving, even if it hurts. I can do this! I just need to be my biggest fan or cheerleader versus critic. I can do this!!
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