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Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Christmas for us

Wow! It's hit me, starting to get really, really, really excited! If you couldn't tell. Shannon woke up and immediately started saying "Merry Christmas" to anyone or anything that would listen. I love it, I love watching her excitement and joy associated with this holiday. I NEVER liked it this much as a kid. But I love her admiration for all the little things. Growing up, I thought our celebrations were rather normal.

When I was younger, we used to go ten-fifteen minutes up the road to find a Christmas tree. Sometimes we would even go higher up, depending on the snow. Still to this day, I love the smell of a fresh-cut tree. So, between the first week and middle weeks of the month, our tree would go up. My mom and I were the ones to decorate the tree, it wasn't until later years when it was just me (with her occasional input). One year we even got a flocked tree, and I promised myself and my husband we would never get one lol. This year was fantastic, because Shannon was quite involved with the decoration process. Things really started to pick up the days following Christmas.

Until I was a teenager, my grandma (mom's mom) would drive up from San Francisco a few days before Christmas. When I was 12 or 13 she moved up to northern California, so from that point on we always celebrated Christmas at her house. We would wrap and finish any last minute shopping, then relax and just enjoy the family time. Christmas Eve would sneak up pretty quick. It was usually a pretty slow day. Depending on which relatives house we were going to on Christmas, my mom would sometimes cook on the eve. One year she made a pumpkin cheesecake. It was HORRIBLE, you needed a chainsaw just to get through the crust. We always got to open one gift on Christmas Eve. I always seemed to find the most embarrassing gift to open, usually socks, underwear, or something just as bad. Christmas was always the busiest day.

I used to wake up incredibly early, just to check my stockings. I always had at least 3 to go through, mom would go hog-wild on Christmas. So, at like 5 am I would wake up, check my stockings, then shove everything back in to open with my parents when they woke up. Mom and step dad would wake up, we'd do stockings, then prepare for whoever was coming over that day. Usually just my grandma and my real dad. When everyone would get there, by the late morning, we would open presents. Mom took pictures every year as well, I don't remember a year when she wasn't behind a camera. We would finish up, then head over to my step dad's parents house to finish up the unwrapping and have Christmas lunch/dinner.

That is the type of Christmas I am comfortable with, and the type I want for my kids. No one was alone on Christmas, not even my father. After his large fallout with my grandmother, he started going to his first wife's house or nowhere at all. I felt so bad his last few Christmasses alive, especially his last Christmas in '05. All he had was me, well, Warren came too, but family wise, we were it! He was so sick and couldn't really leave the house either. I wanted to give him the world that day, I would have if I could.

Christmas was not about Jesus to my family. No nativity scenes, nothing. We didn't read anything from the bible and didn't go to church. A) we were agnostic B) Jesus wasn't even born on Christmas. So, there was no point to it. Sometimes I feel so nervous when celebrating with my in-laws. Every year they read about the birth of Jesus and make that the point of Christmas. I don't and won't raise my children to believe that is the point of Christmas. I will tell them about it, and read to them about it. Like me, I want them to know all the reasons people celebrate Hannukah and Christmas, and historical traditions. My favorite one is when children would put their shoes outside the door, or near the chimney at night and they would be filled with candy and other goodies when they woke up. I would like if they knew about all kinds of Christmas celebrations, especially when they are in my shoes someday to start or carry on traditions with their own family. I don't judge how others celebrate, and I sure as hell won't judge my own children. So, with that being said MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

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